Ann Tancio
Product Review: SumoSac
When the Sumo Lounge peeps contacted us to review their new 6ft SumoSac, I didn’t hesitate to accept the offer. I loved the Omni and think it’s a fantastic product, so I had high hopes for the SumoSac.
First things first. When examining potential furniture for your cave, one has to examine the durability, comfort and most importantly its ease to fornicate on. Having sex with your lady friend on a piece of furniture should always be an integral part of your purchase plan. Think about it, you’re a man and there are occasions when you don’t have the patience or time to lay your woman down on that bear skin you call a bed. You need furniture that will allow you to skip the whole “wooing” process. With that in mind, I present to you my review of the SumoSac.
Before the SumoSac even arrived I noticed there were some obvious differences between it and the Omni:
The SumoSac is more expensive than the Omni. While it’s pricier than the Omni, you’re getting more bang for your buck. Especially when you consider it’s made with a softer fabric and takes up a lot more surface area. So for you guys who need more room cause you’re either 6’4″ or your woman just happens to weigh close to deuce-hundred pounds, you are certainly in luck. There is plenty of room to get your wiggle on.
Now since the SumoSac is much larger and heavier than the Omni it makes it more difficult to move around. Plus it’s also more difficult to find a place for it in your cave. So either you get rid of the recliner that’s parked in front of your TV, or you do what I did. I put my Sumosac on top of my recliner for added comfort. In theory, the Sumosac can be used as a “converter” that allows you to turn any piece of furniture in your cave into a “sex zone.”
The SumoSac has a much softer outer covering than the Omni, and the cover can be removed for machine washing. The nylon on the Omni makes a lot of noise when you move around on it, but the micro suede cover of the Sumo is very quiet. Those of you who have the ill-fated combo of jittery girlfriends plus roommates, no problem. The SumoSac will eliminate those inconveniences for you.
A glaring weakness for the SumoSac is its durability in comparison to the Omni. It’s much easier to tear a hole in the SumoSac or get a stain on it. The Nylon on the Omni took a lot of abuse and was easily cleaned. Misfired? No worries meng. Fortunately, the micro suede is machine washable and comes off rather easily. The Sumosac has your back.
For those of you who care, the SumoSac is available in only 4 colors, while the Omni is available in 10. If your favorite color is lime green then you’re out of luck. Why are you getting lime green anyway? Just get black.
After the product arrived there were some other factors to take into consideration:
The SumoSac had to be assembled before you could start using it. I like that the Omni was plug and play, because I am a lazy bastard. However, I think the SumoSac is a manlier product than the Omni since it takes some elbow grease to get the foam all fluffed out. Not to mention that real men assemble their furniture.
The foam on the inside of the SumoSac was completely different from the little beads inside the Omni. The Omni gave you a very strict sense of comfort while the SumoSac allows you to manipulate your position in a much easier manner. You know what the means right fellas? Yep, jumping from missionary to the Flying Camel without hesitation or roadblocks.
The fabric on the SumoSac requires you to clean it way more often than the Omni. It collects dust, dirt and pet hair very easily. So inform your wench she has extra duties. And for those of you who don’t have a wench, ask your buddy to lend his.
There are also eight different ways of sitting on the Omni; you can’t do the same stuff with the SumoSac. Sucks, I know. But as I mentioned earlier, with all the extra wiggle room you may not need all those various sitting positions.
Overall I like the SumoSac much better. It’s more comfortable and flexible. Its adaptability is just so damn useful. The Omni looks and feels more like a chair, while the SumoSac is just a giant sex facilitator. Your call, but you know which route I’m going with.
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